Oh, I wish I was on a beach like that, swinging in the hammock. For the time being, I like going out into my backyard after 6 PM and sitting in the shadow. My son will play in his pool and run the hose for an hour. It's enjoyable writing or reading on the summer nights.
Today, I felt like I went through a test. Well, other than surviving the heat wave from last week (and that was BAD), I find myself in situations that I put myself in. And I am trying to figure it out.
Boundaries. People have them. We have times to call, when people can raid our fridge and who can use what. But I am beginning to see how easy it is for someone to run over someone and that nice person lets them. I am guilty of it too, on both sides. We can be the toxic person and not realize it, sometimes until it is much too late.
I wish I could tell the people I hurt how sorry I am. But it does not work that way. Some people are not ready to talk. They have the boundary to keep me out. And I am ok with that. I am also ok with building walls between me and some people.
And I find that there is no closure. YOU have to be the person who walks away. When it comes to the destruction of your body and soul, do not ever believe that you are crazy. I did think that once too...and it still costs me. You can take that step. You can make that boundary and forgive yourself for your mistakes.
Sit in the summer sunshine. Soak it in. It might be five minutes. But I promise, at least you don't have to worry so much about the heat and humidity. Wow!
Stay cool, everyone. Until tomorrow...